So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I think I sprained my soul last night
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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