Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
