Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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