I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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