My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I party with great urgency now.
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