I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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