i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
