Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
