Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
