just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
