i think i have two assholes
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
