i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
