i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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