I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
How external is "for external use only"?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
