omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
