God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
This is the high leading the old right now
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
