he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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