i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
We need a shit load of segways right now
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize