We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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