This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize