Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
