So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Randomize
