There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
