Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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