I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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