I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
