I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize