found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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