I think scott just propositioned me for sex
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
