thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
