finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize