This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
