i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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