So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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