we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Randomize
