you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
How external is "for external use only"?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
