Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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