maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
