This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
