that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
