What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize