Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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