I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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