How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
