Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize