Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
