What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
