It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
