My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Randomize
