I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize