he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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