Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
